This week's kitten's guide looks at dizzy heights and features Kai at his dizziest. Yesterday the full-figured stunt kitten decided that having climbed a giant stack of straw without a Sherpa he should then leap from the mighty summit onto the even mightier roof beams of the barn. One more jump and he reached an opening in the gable wall and from there he found a place to sit and gaze down at the ant-like human's toiling in the garden.
So far so good. Then he decides that a stunt kitten with an audience should put on a show. Instead of descending by retracing his steps he decides to use the Wisteria. Now most kittens learn from an early age that Wisteria fire exits are for use only when there are no other means of egress. Here we see Kai a quarter of the way down the Wisteria and attempting to go round the bend - something he usually excels at.
Note the large degree of wobble. He's fifteen feet off the ground and swinging like a high wire act. By the time I'd grabbed the ladder and ran back with it, he'd gone. Not to a Kai-shaped depression in the ground but back inside the barn. He'd managed to climb up the stonework and crawled under a gap in the eaves.
Here we see Kai about to jump back onto the straw pile.
And here we see Kai discovering that climbing down is never as much fun as climbing up. For some reason distances are doubled. And really high stacks of straw become really really high stacks of straw.
Next week, with Kai checking into the celebrity kitten rehab unit, there will be a Lamb Picture Wednesday.
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Well, I knew I shouldn't have written that piece yesterday about Kai's climbing ability.
Today, he excelled himself.
He was on top of our Welsh Dresser, threading his way past the glass storage jars when ... he lost his balance. A back paw grasped at empty air, its companion paw joined it, he started to fall and ... reached out with his front paws to grab the nearest object. Which happened to be a glass Kilner jar. The jar toppled over taking Kai with it. Kai let go of the jar and grabbed for the spice rack, assorted glass bottles and practically everything else on the Dresser shelves - except, of course, the Dresser shelves. That would have been too practical. His descent was spectacular. And strewn with flying glass bottles of various shapes and smells.
Smash. Glass everywhere. Spices everywhere. Panicked cat running off at great speed. A speed far faster that claws on polished tile can cope with. Cue much skidding and unexpected changes of direction. The most unexpected being when he flew back to the scene of crime and ran through the glass for a second time.
Luckily no one - except for the vanilla, an easily bruised spice - was hurt. All glass and pottery vases have now been removed from the top of the Dresser.
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Following on from last week's Kitten's Guide to meal time etiquette, this week Xena and Kai demonstrate the secret of successful climbing - balance.
First up we have Xena showing how the arboreal kitten can navigate complex branch structures without falling off. In fact she doesn't even have to look where she's going. She feels her way along the branch using paws, claws and a cleverly aligned tail for extra balance control.
Next up we have Kai demonstrating what can go wrong.
And remember, kittens, don't try this at home. Kai is a fully trained stunt kitten and is used to hanging precariously from great heights. It's what he does best. Students of balance will note how he's hanging on by a combination of the back paws clawing at one horizontal while his front paws grasp the one above. His posture is wrong, his torso twisted and his tail is having to curve forward to compensate.
If any kittens are wondering how Kai got into that mess in the first place, here is Kai demonstrating The Wobbly Kitten - a high banister manoeuvre without a net. Any second that back end could go and he'd be swinging from the banisters with his back paws around his ears.
But Kai recovers, regains his balance and then ... makes the mistake of looking down.
Another warning for aspiring arboreal kittens, keep your eyes on the branches around you because sometimes when you look down...
Your legs go weak. And it's all too much.
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I saw this on French TV this morning and couldn't believe it. Goats in Morocco that climb trees! And when I say climb I mean really climb. Think infestation, think aphids. Imagine what this flock could do to your orchard.
Here's the picture. It's a classic.
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