chrisdolley ([info]chrisdolley) wrote,
@ 2007-01-22 11:37:00
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Entry tags:cats, humor, humour, kittens, lagos, nigerian, pets, spam, tribbles, tuna

I am Fluffy ... A Kitten's Guide to Nigerian Tuna Spam
Fluffy
Lagos Cat Pound,
Nigeria

Dear Friend,

I am Fluffy, the favourite kitten of the late president of Nigeria. As you know my late master was very very rich man and he left me all his tuna. But, as kitten, I not allowed to have fridge of my own.

My good friend, there are many many fishes and without more fridges tuna go bad. I eat as many as I can but I small kitten and much sick. So I write you, my very good friend, as your name well known in Nigeria as godly person with many fridges.

If you help store my tuna I give you 20% (TWENTY AMERICAN PER CENTS) of each fish - including heads.

Please be writing back soon. Weather hot and there are many bad cats looking with the eyes at my fishes.

Your good friend,

Fluffy




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[info]irreparable
2007-01-22 11:22 am UTC (link)
Hahahhaha, oh I needed that laugh! Thank you for that!

(Reply to this) (Thread)

[info]7wrc
2007-05-02 07:23 pm UTC (link)
:-)

(Reply to this) (Parent)
(no subject) - [info]anikowugaj, 2008-07-11 10:10 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]irreparable, 2008-07-11 10:25 am UTC

[info]orejen
2007-01-22 01:44 pm UTC (link)
How appropriate, I just got one of those Nigerian bank scam letters today. I might be more inclined to respond if it WERE tuna fish! (My 16 year old daughter and two cats LOVE tuna.)

(Reply to this) (Thread)

(Reply from suspended user)

[info]vandonovan
2007-01-22 02:10 pm UTC (link)
Ahaahhaha!!! Got to love those ridiculous scams.


Mmm, but 20 AMERICAN PERCENT with the heads?! It's almost worth the gamble! XD

(Reply to this) (Thread)

[info]ellipser
2007-01-22 07:08 pm UTC (link)
Yes, because we know 20 NIGERIAN PERCENT is not as much. XD

(Reply to this) (Parent)

[info]outlanderssc
2007-01-22 02:28 pm UTC (link)
"godly person with many fridges" ROFL!

This is very clever. Nigerian Kitty can use my many fridges any time he likes -

(Reply to this)


[info]kittygirl_09
2007-01-22 02:35 pm UTC (link)
That is wonderfulness. Making my heart with happiness. ^_^

(Reply to this)


[info]ravenfair
2007-01-22 02:38 pm UTC (link)
HAHA! What a great way to start the morning.. with a good laugh and a beautiful kitten. :)

(Reply to this) (Thread)

(Reply from suspended user)

[info]happiestsadist
2007-01-22 02:42 pm UTC (link)
Heehee! Those scams are so ridiculous, and that kitten is made of pure cute.

(Reply to this) (Thread)

[info]shantidove
2007-01-22 07:39 pm UTC (link)
omg kitten cotton candy...I just died.

(Reply to this) (Parent)
(no subject) - [info]fairyair, 2007-01-23 03:09 am UTC

[info]jiggliusceasar
2007-01-22 02:50 pm UTC (link)
Very funny.

Are 20 American percent different than 20 Nigerian percent?

(Reply to this) (Thread)

[info]chrisdolley
2007-01-22 03:01 pm UTC (link)
Definitely. The exchange rate is one American per cent for many many Nigerian per cents:)

(Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)
(no subject) - [info]kijjohnson, 2007-01-22 05:52 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]elephantgiraffe, 2007-01-23 05:25 am UTC

[info]outlanderssc
2007-01-22 02:56 pm UTC (link)
I notice that even though the kitten is "favourite kitten of the late president of Nigeria", the return address is Lagos cat Pound.

Very authentic -

(Reply to this)


(Anonymous)
2007-01-22 03:20 pm UTC (link)
Dear Fluffy
I love tuna and can eat lots of it because I'm a very big kitten and my mum's got a very big fridge. Where can I put my paw print?
Yummily
Billy Boy

(Reply to this) (Thread)

[info]chrisdolley
2007-01-22 04:02 pm UTC (link)
My dear Billy Boy, I am very very pleased to hear your glad news. Now please to give me location of your mum's very big fridge and when she not be there and I will send you many many (MANY MANY) fish.

Remember to leave cat door unlocked.

Your very good friend,

Fluffy

(Reply to this) (Parent)

[info]janetmweiss
2007-01-22 03:50 pm UTC (link)
EEEE! *grins madly*

(Reply to this)


[info]ninius
2007-01-22 04:14 pm UTC (link)
ROFL! Excellent. :D

All scams should be carried out by cats. They'd never fail.

(Reply to this) (Thread)

[info]hopefulnebula
2007-01-22 05:01 pm UTC (link)
I wouldn't know about that. :p

(Reply to this) (Parent)
(no subject) - [info]keristor, 2007-01-24 05:28 pm UTC

[info]white_wolf75
2007-01-22 04:30 pm UTC (link)
omg fabulous - i should so give this to my professor who's currently examining nigerian spam letters ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha.....

=D =D =D

(Reply to this) (Thread)

[info]99catsaway
2007-01-23 01:38 pm UTC (link)
You totally should!

(Reply to this) (Parent)
(no subject) - [info]mzmadmike, 2007-01-23 03:01 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]white_wolf75, 2007-01-23 06:10 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]mzmadmike, 2007-01-23 10:10 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]belindashort, 2007-01-31 05:57 am UTC

[info]blueskycomplex
2007-01-22 05:13 pm UTC (link)
Funniest thing I've read all day!

(Got here through [info]baaaaabyanimals, hope you don't mind me commenting in your personal journal though!)

(Reply to this)


[info]anghara
2007-01-22 06:07 pm UTC (link)
All right, you are just SO lucky I didn't have my usual cup of coffee with me down here or you'd have owed me a new keyboard...

(Reply to this) (Thread)

[info]anghara
2007-01-22 06:07 pm UTC (link)
PS - which Tribble was that?

(Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)
(no subject) - [info]chrisdolley, 2007-01-22 09:01 pm UTC

[info]phonographgirl
2007-01-22 06:10 pm UTC (link)
That made my morning, thank you! :)

(Reply to this)


[info]machine_kisses
2007-01-22 06:13 pm UTC (link)
-OMG-

That is Hilarious!Twenty American Per Cents!

You just made my day.

(Reply to this)


[info]sometimesdee
2007-01-22 06:24 pm UTC (link)
That is beautiful!

(Reply to this)


[info]wordweaverlynn
2007-01-22 06:29 pm UTC (link)
Just what I needed!

(Reply to this)


[info]griffen
2007-01-22 06:43 pm UTC (link)
You win the internets today. And a barrel of fish heads, too.

(Reply to this)

Dear Kitten...
[info]risingpheenix
2007-01-22 06:53 pm UTC (link)
It is with my utmost happiness that I wish to offer you many fridges for the 20 per cents American for your fish. We are verily happy that you have finally contacted us and wish to proceed with the forthcoming fridge/fish exchange. In our country you are widely known to be a kitten of good standing obtaining the best fishes possible.

(Reply to this)


[info]shantidove
2007-01-22 07:33 pm UTC (link)
brilliant!

(Reply to this)


[info]ethora
2007-01-22 09:22 pm UTC (link)
HAHAHA YAY!

(Reply to this)


[info]ms_xeno
2007-01-23 01:59 am UTC (link)
=^oo^=

I linked to this at the My Cat Hates You boards. I'm sure they'll love it, too.

(Reply to this)


[info]norabombay
2007-01-23 05:03 am UTC (link)
That is much with the awesomeness.

(Reply to this) (Thread)

[info]mactavish
2007-01-23 06:17 am UTC (link)
"Hey, doggie, why the long face?"

(Reply to this) (Parent)

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